Sunday, August 15, 2010

I fear that I will always do what you say is best, instead of what I know I should be doing.
I fear that you will turn out exactly like they told me you would.
I fear I'm becoming the person I said I'd never be.

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

I fear being alone. I fear that people are going to leave eventually even after I make a connection with them. I fear that I wont do enough to make a difference in the world. I fear losing myself...
I fear that i don't love you as much as i think i do and that I am going to break your heart. I fear losing you

Thursday, May 20, 2010

I fear the fact that I have to do this all by myself and no one will help me. Everyone thinks I'm so mature and I have it all together, but I don't.
I fear that the depression I might be in is one day going to be too much of a burden. I fear that one day I will leave all of my friends, and my family so that I don't have them to use as a standard to compare myself to. I fear that I'm going to feel worthless for the rest of my life
I fear that I will never understand how much you love me truelt and I won't be able to live up to your expectations. You have saved me from myself and all I can do is love you. I'm scared to death that one day I will hurt you and either of us will go back to ways and get hurt more. I fear that if for any reason this doesn't work out, that you have lost your family for nothing.
I fear that I will end up like my mother and father.

Sunday, April 25, 2010

I used to think my biggest fear was that I'd never fall in love like I know I'm meant to.

I still fear that.

But I know that my darkest fear is that I'm too messed up to every find love. That I'll stop myself from letting it happen if the opportunity ever does arise.

My biggest fear is that I'll be stuck in this dark cavern of loneliness forever.
I'm terrified of falling back into a dark trap.

I fear this feeling, that I can sense is pulling me down, farther and farther from myself, at a moment when I most need to be focussed, alive, down-to-earth.

I need myself so I can pass these exams that I'm so desperately afraid of failing.

And my family needs me.

I fear the loss of everything I love and want so much, and I fear I will have to face that fear, soon.
I fear that one day you'll fall in love with me and I won't be able to love you back. I won't be able to make you happy. The one thing I fear is that someday I might have to hurt you. I'm sorry.
i fear that my habit of over thinking things, will one day destroy all happiness i have.

i fear not being 'great' like everyone expects, like i expect. i want to be remembered.

i fear crossing the road.

i fear one day you wont want me anymore.

i fear ill keep making excuses for everyone, allowing myself to be constantly mistreated, because of their 'valid reasons'


Monday, March 22, 2010

My biggest fear is to never have children. My husband wont adopt and we've been trying for a year. I am so scared something is wrong with me and I will never get to experience what I have wanted since I was a little child. I just want to be a mother. :(
I fear that I will not be a good enough mom to my two wonderful little boys. I fear that I will fail at being a mother like I have failed at so many other things in my life. I fear that they will hate me like I hate my mother.

Friday, February 12, 2010

The thing I fear most is losing my memories and my mind. I know that something is different. Words, names, places, and people. Everything is harder to find, it's slowly slipping away. I hope it's just a normal part of aging, but either way, it still scares the heck out of me. Words, discussions, and stories, is who I am. Without my own "history," in my own mind, I'll have nothing.

I'm frantic about getting it all down in writing and hope I don't run out of time. I feel that I've forgotten a lot of my "life" stories already, but I don't know what they were.
The only thing to fear is to be forced to chose between living the life of the person you hate the most, or not living at all...

Sunday, February 7, 2010

I fear the fact that most of the time I have to be "tough" just to keep the fear down and even though my mind fears nothing certain things can almost put me on my knees in an instant. I hate this.

Monday, February 1, 2010

The only thing I fear is... fear.

I know what it's like to have a panic attack. And I never want to have one again. There was a time when I was afraid of things... when the anxiety would build without me even realizing it and it overwhelmed me, and sometimes a panic attack would set it. Now? Now I'm so afraid of having a panic attack that the fear of that itself leads to a panic attack all on its own. Whenever I get into a situation that holds memories of past anxiety, the worry of an oncoming attack takes hold.

I'm not afraid of the things I'm afraid of anymore... I'm not afraid of things. I don't need them. I'm afraid of the fear itself... of my mind hazing, my hands shaking, my heart palpitating as though I'm having a heart attack, of my guts twisting until I feel as though I might throw up... of the uncontrollable feeling of sheer dread taking over my body - without cause and without cure.

Tuesday, January 5, 2010

i fear that i'll make the same mistakes that they did. i fear that i'll never be able to live with a healthy relationship, because the only "healthy" relationship in which i know is the abusive one led by my parents. I'm afraid that because of this, I'll never be able to trust anyone.
I fear that I'll never be able to look him, or anyone, in the eyes and actually mean it when i say "i'll miss you, or i love you, or i need you." I'm afraid i'll always have to look away or not be able to say it, because i won't mean it.
I'm afraid i'm heading down the same path that they were on, and that I won't be able to forge ahead on the better path, the one i so helplessly need to tread my tracks on. I fear that i am destined to be just like them... and i fear that i'll hate myself because of that.

Sunday, December 27, 2009

i fear that i'll make the same mistakes that they did. i fear that i'll never be able to live with a healthy relationship, because the only "healthy" relationship in which i know is the abusive one led by my parents. I'm afraid that because of this, I'll never be able to trust anyone.
I fear that I'll never be able to look him, or anyone, in the eyes and actually mean it when i say "i'll miss you, or i love you, or i need you." I'm afraid i'll always have to look away or not be able to say it, because i won't mean it.
I'm afraid i'm heading down the same path that they were on, and that I won't be able to forge ahead on the better path, the one i so helplessly need to tread my tracks on. I fear that i am destined to be just like them... and i fear that i'll hate myself because of that.

Monday, December 21, 2009

letting the rest of the team down because I'm not amazing like they are. I'm sorry.
I fear that I will never ever get over the rape, and the abusive relationship.. and that I will never allow another male to get close to me ever again. I fear that even though I have finally found a man who I can trust, I don't know if I'll ever be comfortable being physical with him. Everytime I even think about it old memories pop into my head and bring me down. I love him, but I fear that I am going to hurt him by physically pushing him away from me.. but I don't know how much I can take.. I really do love him and I hope he realizes it's nothing to do with him and he's done nothing but make my situation easier
I fear that he is not real and that I made up our relationship in my head.

Saturday, November 28, 2009

the only thing to fear is birds. trust me.
I fear I will never get over him.
I fear my husband will take my daughter if he finds out about him.
I fear that I wont care as long as I am with him forever.

Thursday, November 12, 2009

i fear finding out that he actually IS dead, something that i (and my heart) refuse to believe. i think about it almost every day. i do not know what i'm gonna do if he is.
cry, go into depression, i honestly dont know. part of me actually almost believes it, but the rest of me refuses to acknowledge it. i just refuse. he cant be dead. he CANT. i will only believe it under one circumstance. and i have no idea whatsoever how i'm to go about finding out about it. so i guess my poor heart must suffer through this until i know for sure, not that i entirely want to know in the first place..

I fear getting over this and forgetting about my baby. I miss him so much but everyday that passes makes it a little easier. It's my fault though I deserve to live in the grief that I have been in since the abortion. I fear that when I do finally get over this you'll completely leave me. Right now atleast were still friends, but once I'm okay your going to be gone leaving me with nothing.

Sunday, November 8, 2009

I'm so afraid of getting rejected that I've rarely ever been able to tell the girls who I truly care about that I like them. My ideal relationship is to be with someone who I am best friends with. The problem is that once I develop a strong friendship I give up on turning it into a relationship because I fear the rejection from someone that I am close to. This has caused me to have only superficial relationships that go nowhere and I'm scared that I will be alone forever because I will never have the guts to tell someone that I like them

Sunday, October 18, 2009

I fear that I will fail at everything I ever do, that nothing will be good enough and none of it will mean anything.

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

My oldest son lives with his dad. He chose to go live with his dad and I could have spent $100,000 to fight it and maybe won the court battle and caused my son unknown emotional damage to resent the hell out of me, or I could let him live with his dad and miss him everyday of my life. I chose to let him live with his dad. And missing him leaves a hole in me that most people will never understand. My new husband and I tried for 10 years to have a child - and we did!!! We have an absolutely beautiful almost 3 year old little boy who is the light of my life. He doesn't replace his big brother, but he brings me joy every single day. My fear? My gut-wrenching, deepest, darkest, most horrific fear? That my oldest son going to live with his dad was the universe's way of telling me I wasn't meant to be a mom and now I've tempted fate and something horrible is going to happen to my little boy and I'm going to lose him too. I can't sleep at night sometimes because I am so scared.
I fear myself more than anything.

To be at a point where I am more myself than ever before, to be at a point where I am accepting my sexuality, my image, my thoughts and my eccentric behaviour, and yet to not fully trust myself terrifies me.
I fear myself, because I am not sure I can trust myself with my life.

I fear that I will not be able to do what I want to, and that I will end up harming myself because I can't deal with the failure.

I fear myself because it nearly always takes a conscious effort for me not to press a sharp object into my skin when I am picking it up. I don't fear sharps. I fear my hands when they hold them.

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

I fear the sickness coming on...I'm about to be dopesick AGAIN and I have this new job I HAVE to go to and no hope of relief for another TWO WEEKS when I can get my medication refilled. I know how badly I am going to feel, I've been sick this way a thousand times. I keep doing it to myself and fear I will never be able to stop. I'm not even out of meds yet- I've got 20 pills left, but I am locked into sharing them with *him* and me, I take 20 a day all by myself, so 20 pills left is nothing. I am so afraid of what I know is to come, there's no way out of it, either. It's like steaming down hill and seeing the cliff at the bottom but being unable to stop...
I fear following my dreams,

I fear if I do I won't make it like all the other starving artists out there.

I fear failure

I fear that I will be alone forever. that no one besides my parents will love me.
I fear that I'll never have any true friends. I've found that I'm a loyal friend, while the people I thought were friends aren't actually friends at all; they use me. I don't know how to make new friends, and I'm lonely.
the thing i fear the most is myself
i fear im going to stay silent for the rest of my life, and i fear, this is going to make me all alone as i get older..
my fear is leaving this life with the same feeling that I have live it, with the impression or feeling that there is something that I should still do or have not done yet, a purpose not completed , unfinished business. I do not want to have regrets when i leave...
I fear I never really tried hard or risked anything and as a result I have not lived the life I should have lived...and now I am older and it is too late.

Wednesday, September 2, 2009

i fear im going to stay silent for the rest of my life, and i fear, this is going to make me all alone as i get older..

Monday, August 31, 2009

I fear that I will never be able to really let you go. Even though it's been over a year and you've clearly moved on, I can't help hoping that one day, you'll come back to me. I fear that I will waste many more years waiting for you, when I know deep down, you'll never be back.
I fear that love will one day be the death of me.
My biggest fear is that it was my fault you left. We had it all, but I kept wanting more and now it terrifies me to think that I'll be alone forever and it's all my fault.
My greatest fear is that the reason why you are going to die is because I'm not enough for you.

That I'm not enough of a reason for you to keep living, even though there is no reason for fearing this, I'm still really scared that it is true.
I fear being the only single friend in our group. There's nothing lonelier than watching all of my friends with their boyfriends/girlfriends while I'm all alone, knowing that I let love slip through my fingers.

Wednesday, August 12, 2009

I fear that what happened to end me and him(meeting you) will happen to me and you. I'm afraid to lose you to someone else and sit there in pain. I've seen his. And it hurts.
Knowing that your end is near and also know you never felt real love and never really lived.
The shame of my "emotional" infidelity coming to light.That one day, you will find out that everytime we sit across from each other at dinner, I wish it was "him". That everytime we discuss our future, I wish it was "him".That everytime you get into bed...I wish it was "him".

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

I fear going to the doctor on Monday. I fear that she's going to have to leave with her family. I fear losing my family because of this.

Friday, July 31, 2009

I fear that when my husband leaves for Iraq, that will be the last time I ever see him.
the only thing to fear, is you leaving, and me never, being able to feel what i felt with you. i love you so much.

Thursday, July 30, 2009

I fear facing who I've become.

Wednesday, July 29, 2009

The shame of my "emotional" infidelity coming to light.That one day, you will find out that everytime we sit across from each other at dinner, I wish it was "him". That everytime we discuss our future, I wish it was "him".That everytime you get into bed...I wish it was "him".

Tuesday, July 28, 2009

I fear that one day my 4 yr old will find out about my past affair and hate me for it.
life and love
I fear I will never be able to tell you how I feel, simply because I'm to much of a coward and you're so damn nice. I fear that, if I tell you, I'll lose our friendship.
I'm about to get married to the love of my life. I've loved him for ten years, and we've been friends for thirteen. I feel like I know everything about him. Now I'm afraid that I'll say or do something stupid in the future to make him leave me alone and miserable.
I fear that you really are gone forever; that there's nothing after death.
I fear that getting back together was a mistake.
I fear not picking the right major. I don't want to be jobless once I graduate.F/18
I fear not living my life to the fullest. To see my time ticking away and doing nothing about it. I fear growing old, and not being able to do all the things i want to do. I fear that what all my friends and family called "the time of my life" will be just as mediocure as everything else, because i'm too scared to take chances.18F
I fear I will scare you off. I fear you just say those words because you know I want to hear them and you know I don't want to lose you again.I fear not being able to be enough for you, you deserve the best and I really hope thats what I do for you. I fear my love for you will lead you somewhere else. I fear not being beautiful enough - inside and out. I fear you will find someone who makes you smile more, laugh more, treats you better, and isnt so boring.I fear you getting away, me having nothing left after this because all I have is put into you. It sounds stupid but thinking about it I dont know what would happen if I lost you, as cliche as this sounds I really dont know.
my biggest fear is and always has been turning into you.

i hate what you've done, you will never knowthe damage you caused.

what 3 year old needs to see her daddy and sister trying to kill themselves?

a second time?

for the seventh time?

i want to happy but all i can do id hurt myself.

i fear i'll be come you.
my biggest fear is that no one will ever love you as much as i do. you deserve that kind of love, but we cant happen & i'll be gone soon.i love you cuppiecake, & i always will <3f/17
I'm afraid I'm failing at life. I'm afraid that I've already lost everything important to me.
I fear that I won't live my life to the fullest and that in an attempt to prevent that..i'll end up messing up my chances.

Wednesday, May 27, 2009

i will never love me back.

please talk to me again.
i miss you,
pink duck
I fear that we'll never meet again, that i'll never see those beautiful brown eyes and hear that stupid accent. Because in that week we met and the 3 years that followed, i think you took a little piece of my heart and i fear now more than ever, that's all it will ever be.
i fear that our friendship will never be the same again that the moments and memories we have shared over the past years are the end. i fear that no matter how hard we both try and promise to try and make our frienship work we will fail.

i fear that our drunken nights out will only be full of heated fights and our days bickering with each other.

i fear we will fake the frienship from the past just to pretend to each other it is still the same.

i fear that when we hear that song with or without you live tears will run down knowing that our closeness will be gone forever.
My biggest fear is to live my life alone, to never love someone and be loved in return. To have a family of my own is all i've ever wished for.
I'm 39 years old and in love with my Best Freind who is married.. We've done things we shouldnt have and we have fallen for each other. Now, she has become distant and I dont know what to do. I'm afraid I'm going to loose her forever.
i fear this happiness that is so wonderful will leave me one day.

i fear he will realize how boring i can be.

i know im just letting time pass me yet i dont change a thing.
i think that scares me the most.
I fear that i wont make the right choice and someone will get hurt in the end, i love my best friend and trying to be good enough to make him see he feels the same way, but on the way another boy fell in love with me, i fear ill do the wrong thing and i loose both friends.
I fear that I'll never be comfortable truly loving men, but too shy to start something with women.
i fear i don't fear anything because there is nothing left inside of me.

Tuesday, February 17, 2009

i fear that no matter how much i try and how much i effort i will never make anyone happy, i will never do good enough in my parents and siblings eyes
I fear that I will be like any of the leads of the following movies: Never Been Kissed, Forty Year Old Virgin, Miss Congeniality, She's All That....without the happy ending.

Sunday, February 1, 2009

I have many chronic stomach problems, a liver disease I inherited, and endometreosis. Im 33. I don't know if Im more afraid if passing young and leaving everyone behind, or more afraid of suffering for years & living.
I fear that I wont know where to draw the line and will ruin my life.

Female, 14

Monday, January 12, 2009

I'm terribly afraid of death...mine or anyone close to me. I actually think it has become a phobia.Yet...I think I might have breast cancer but I'm terrified to go to the doctor. I haven't told anyone because I know they would make me face my fear of death and I don't think I can handle it.

I'm terrified.

Female, 23
i can't decide what i fear more, being loved and not being able to accept it, again....or not being loved at all.

Monday, January 5, 2009

I fear that they will kick me off my degree when I go for that meeting. If I lose my degree, I lose the only thing I am sure right now is good, the only thing I have to aim for. Around it I can build my life, but without it all meaning will be taken away. If I lose it I lose everything.
I fear that I'm going to break my only New Year's Resolution, which is to not commit suicide, and be alive for the next new year.
I fear that my best will never be enough.

Friday, January 2, 2009

I fear that 2009 will not be as great as I want it to be. I fear that I will just keep living this life, and going nowhere with it. I want to live, I want to be free, and most of all, I want to be happy. I fear that I will not get all of those.
i fear that i'm actually happier alone then with someone. i fear that i like the independence too much, but most of all, i fear that i'm never going to be with someone who loves, and that that's gonna be okay with me.

Tuesday, December 30, 2008

I'm a 22 year old female and my vision is failing me. I fear losing my vision before I get married to the love of my life, to see the happiness on his face when I get to wear that white dress my mother made me, before I get to see the ring he worked so hard to buy for me, before I get to see his face when we conceive our first child, and before I get to meet my children...

Saturday, December 27, 2008

I fear letting myself get too close to my best friend...and slipping and doing something that I'll regret. I know he wouldn't be interested in me romantically because he's gay...

...but I'm afraid of jeopardizing our friendship by falling for him anyways.
I fear that one day, I will come home from school and find my parents dead. From that fear sprouted another fear- the fear that they will not live to see my wedding. Each day I get off my bus and hold my breath, waiting for the day I will come home to an empty house.
I fear that I will not have the nerve to make an appointment with the school guidance counsellor after the Christmas holidays.

I fear that I will be too scared to tell the guidance counsellor all the many good reasons that I think I have OCD.

I fear that they won't believe me.
I fear that they will.

I fear that I do have OCD.
I fear that I don't have OCD and am just being an idiot.
I'm scared of losing control. I'm scared that I'll pick up those scissors and do what I've been trying to hard to fight. It's all because of you, you've made me like this: scared, lonely, deperate - for some kind of release; some kind of heaven from this hell.

You've made me afraid of my myself and I'll never forgive you know what makes this all so hard?

That I still love you, always have and always will.
I'm afraid of getting too close to my best friend-- I might wind up hurting my boyfriend.

Although I love my boyfriend and would never want to hurt him, I also fear that because he is NOT the one who is my best friend, that maybe we shouldn't really be together...

Saturday, December 20, 2008

I fear failure. I fear that I am not clever enough to be studying for my degree in Literature. I fear that my hardwork is not hard enough. I fear that I shall have to make my part time job into a full time job. I fear the career I want will not live up to my expectations. I fear that I shall spend so much time trying to be successful in the career that I shall forget to have a family and when I remember it will be too late. I'm scared that I will never find anyone who I can truly love. I'm scared because the one thing I want more than anything else is a family, but I don't think I will ever find my soul mate.I fear that I shall have to focus so much on my career in order to be a success at something, rather than being seen as a failure.I fear that in the process of aspiring to better myself and make a difference through teaching, I will fail to have the life I really want.

My biggest fear is that I will somehow lose him. Not that he will leave me, or that I will leave him, but more that there will be some freak accident or medical condition or something that will take him from me.

I've loved him my whole life. He's my soul mate.

There is nothing about me that he doesn't know, and the same for him.

My life would be over if his ever was.
i'm afraid she'll mean it when she says she thinks it's not worth fixing..... and neither am i.

33, m

Wednesday, December 17, 2008

I fear that the girl my boyfriend and i broke up over will say yes to him.

He loves her, i know he truly does, but i'm terrified that she'll say yes and date him and fall for him to.

Because like a child, i want him to be miserable. I want him to miss me and to want me back and i fear that he wont.

I fear that in a few months they'll be in love with eachother and i'll still be all by myself.
My only valid and biggest fear in life is the possibility that something horrible could happen to one of my kids and their lifes/life would end before mine.
I am afraid that maybe I am stronger and more independent than I want to be.

I want to be taken care of, loved adored.

But I think maybe what my fulfillment is, is to live on my own and love god and love people but not be in any romantic entanglements.

Tuesday, December 16, 2008

I'm afraid of needles. I can't get blood drawn and I refuse to donate. Shots are alright, piercings and tattoos are alright, but needles for taking blood... I can't even think of them without crunching together into a ball in fear. It goes back to when I was little and they thought I had ovarian cancer. They pricked me with needles constantly, doing blood tests and all of that. It got so bad that nurses had to hold me down because I was so sick of it. The last time I let them take my blood was when I was 10, and I had to bite my lip to stop myself from crying. I never had the cancer they thought I did, but I still refuse to take blood tests to this day. It's extremely foolish on my part, but I can't conquer that fear.
I'm afraid that i'll never have the ability to love again
i fear that i will never find that person
My greatest fear is that I will fall in love. And someone will then have power over me, and posses the power to hurt me.

Just the thought gives me chills.

Sunday, December 7, 2008

I am going back home for Christmas. My boyfriend of 2 years broke up with me 2 weeks after I moved away. I have had the worst days of my life since then.

I fear that when I run into him this Winter Break, his eyes will be empty and his heart indifferent. I don't know what I will do.

Thursday, December 4, 2008

I'm afraid i'll never be good enough for anyone.

I'm afraid that i wont do well enough to go to a good college.

I'm afraid that i'm terribly jealous of my best friend.

I'm afraid my boyfriend, who i care SOOOOO much about is going to break up with me.....this weekend.

Tuesday, December 2, 2008

I fear that the pressure and the stress is going to become so much that I lose my patience entirely and tell my entire Drama Queen Family to GO TO HELL!

Friday, November 28, 2008

I fear that he won't ever love me as much as I love him and he won't want to spend the rest of our lives together, even though it's all I can ever think about and he's the only person I can ever picture myself with.

Monday, November 24, 2008

My biggest fear is that I will die during childbirth (I am due in 2 days). I am so scared of leaving my husband to mourn and raise a newborn...I am so scared!
i fear that once i get out of high school i wont live my life to the fullest i'll fail and end up being homeless

i fear that once i have kids, if i do, that i will stay fat, just like my mom
i hate being this selfish but thats me
i wish i could just erase these fears but i can't.

Sunday, November 23, 2008

i used to fear my best friend dying.

now that shes gone i fear she can't hear me when i talk to her.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

What am I afraid of? I'm afraid of myself; afraid of the person I might become, the things I might do and the feelings I might feel. I'm afraid I'll lose control of the one thing that I have control of in my life...myself.

Friday, November 14, 2008

i'm afraid that no one will remember me because i've done nothing worth remembering. the idea of growing up to be like my parents, just like millions of other people, scares me more than anything. i don't always want to be a nobody. i'll die, and so will my friends and family, and the world will continue and no one will know who i was and it will have made no difference if i was alive or not. i'm afraid that as i lay dying and look back on my life i will see no importance in any of my actions, only regrets.
I am afraid of losing you to drugs. I am afraid that I will either stay with you and you will continue your pattern throughout your life, and that I will never have the guts to leave you.

I am also afraid of leaving you because I love you so much, and I know that just the thought of losing you makes me want to cringe.

I am afraid that I will never find anyone who treats me the way that you do, and that I will be alone forever.

I am afraid that if I say "goodbye", that you will not leave it the way it is.

I am afraid that you won't come after me.

I am afraid that you will come after me.

I am afraid that you will never change.

Wednesday, November 12, 2008

I used to be afraid of not having control.

I couldnt let my family leave with out repeating 'I love you, becareful' a million times.

I prayed all day for the safety & happiness of my family & friends.

But now I finally feel free of these anxieties.

I know that God has a plan, & I should fear nothing. He is in control over everything & I have given all my burdens to him.

My biggest fear is indifference

I'm scared because it seems to me that time stopped right at the summer of my seventeenth year. I just loved him, even if it wasn't meant to last more than a month because of distance. Then my heart ached and I felt pain. But ever since that day, and it's been one year and a half, my heart never raced again, I could never let any guy in the same way I did with him. I tried to kick the hands of the clock forwards but every time, I am reminded how it ended up last time.
I am afraid I will never fall in love again.

Thursday, October 30, 2008

im 16 years young.
and i am not afraid of death but afraid of being alone.
but thats what everyone fears in the end.
they wish they could be loved and love someone.
but in the end what is love really.
but just a word and a feeling you think it is.
i havnt loved yet so i cant say or judge.
i still fear of being alone


Sunday, October 26, 2008

What scares me is not the idea of being alone for the rest of my life.

I do not fear love, nor do I fear pain...I can live with being unoriginal..I’m not scared of the dark or of spiders...And I would sooner embrace change than hide from it.I am not afraid of death, and I am not afraid of what does or does not happen after death.

I have as many problems as an ordinary teenager/girl/child.

But my problems are not ordinary

My secret is that I’m scared I’ll spend my life as someone who makes no difference.

At 18 I want to make an impact.- I’m scared that not only will no one know who I am, but I will fail to ever find out who I am myself.

At 18 I understand I am young. I understand maybe it doesn't make sense for a reason, maybe someday it will, maybe it was never intended too.-

I'm scared that I don't have it in myself to be great.

At 18 I want to be great.

Friday, October 24, 2008

I fear that one day she's going to say enough and walk away...

Or worse, that I will.
I fear that now that I've started I will never stop, and no amount of your kisses could ever fix this.
I fear that she will never love me 'that' way again..... and our life together will be wasted on the what ifs.

Tuesday, October 14, 2008

I fear that I have lost you forever. I fear that you will never give me the chance to do what I didn't, say what I couldn't, or love you the way you loved me.

I fear that you... my hero, my angel, my soulmate, my renaissance... will never realize that I am and always have been in love with you.

Monday, October 13, 2008

I fear trusting people and letting others into my life. I fear that if I do, it will only hurt again. I fear that you will move on and forget me. I fear that I will never get over this. I fear being alone. I fear not being able to live without you. I fear that this pain will only get worse.

Sunday, October 5, 2008

I fear losing my best friend in the entire world. She completes me- and knows how to speak right to my heart. She listens, truly listens, and she is the most genuine individual I know. I love her with every bone in my body- and would be devastated if anything ever were to happen to her or our friendship.

I love you to the moon and back.
Please don't ever leave me.

Female (19)

Wednesday, October 1, 2008

I fear losing the people that are most important to me whether it be that they die or they just ignore me or something.

I fear that I aim too high and that if I don't achieve what i aim, I'll crash lower than i would ever have thought that i could have gone.

i fear other people dying more than my own death because i fear the pain that will cause me. But I also fear that if I die too early, i will never get the chance to love and be loved and achieve my dreams.

But, I can't be too scared of death I guess, because I would rather sacrifice my life for saving someone (even if I didn't know them) so that they could survive and live their dreams.

viv (female, 14)

Sunday, September 28, 2008

I fear never feeling again the way I felt when I was with you. I fear it was all my imagination and what I am living now is real. I fear that you think it was a mistake and you don't feel it was a beautiful as I do.

I fear being alone, knowing that I still love you and always have - but realising you don't want me, and never really did.

I fear, that those 6weeks were a lie...and that I never really experienced real love.
I fear I have lost my soul mate.

Thursday, September 18, 2008

I fear loving someone intensely and losing them. I fear never loving someone enough, but being with them anyway just to avoid being alone. I fear wasting my life away because there's nothing inside to keep me going. I fear finding out there really isn't any point. I fear ugliness. I fear pain. I fear my limits. I fear knowing that each month my suicide plans get more detailed. I fear my cowardice and knowing I'm only alive by default. I fear finding out I'm stupid. I fear everyone hating me. I fear losing limbs. I fear life. I fear nothingness. I fear living forever. I fear awareness. I fear my sins catching up with me. I fear I really am a waste of time - I have looked at it rationally and in relation to other people, and some people simply have more worth. I fear this is not warped thinking but simply true. I fear that morals and goodness are convenient social constructs brought on by evolutionary necessity. I fear growing old. I fear my continual desire to walk into walls. I fear never knowing till it's too late. I fear "good enough" because it never is.

Saturday, September 13, 2008

I fear this lack of motivation within me, one that threatens to debilitate any potential that I may or may not have. Something's gone wrong, and the will to try is no longer there.

Tuesday, September 9, 2008

I fear that nobody truly loves me

I fear being alone

I fear the dark and unknown

I fear the death of my loved ones.

I fear being forgotten...

Monday, September 8, 2008

I'm severely afraid of death, both my own and other people's. Every little weird thing my body does is clearly a symptom of a deadly, incurable disease and sends me running to the doctor. I think about how every single thing I do affects my health, and I do the same with everyone else. When I see someone I care about doing something unhealthy, I immediately start thinking of the years they are taking off their lives. I used to cry every time my boyfriend lit up a cigarette, until he finally quit!But more than I am afraid of death, I'm afraid that I'm so afraid of death, that I've forgotten how to live.
I fear I will never love anyone enough and if I do, they won't love me back.I fear death because I don't want to leave my family but I am more scared that my family will die and leave me.Sometimes I fear myself because I feel so empty and I don't know why and I wonder if I can ever make the feeling go away.

Wednesday, September 3, 2008

I fear being alone for the rest of my life.

I fear not finding my prince charming.

I fear he won't want me if he knows my secret.

Tuesday, September 2, 2008

I fear love.

Monday, August 25, 2008

i fear i will be alone all my life, and never find someone i love who will love me back=(

i also fear i will always hate life and it wont get better.
I fear not being around my parents in their last times.

Saturday, August 23, 2008

I fear getting old.

Saturday, July 19, 2008

I fear being elderly and senile, then promising someone I'll see them in the morning, and then die in my sleep and break my word to them.
I fear that my friends only like me superficially and that deep down I repulse them.
I fear failure and that my life will never be rid of the whole mess that my family's in. I fear life itself, but I fear death more. I have made plans to commit suicide but I was too much a coward to go through with it (although I suppose that is a blessing in itself).
I fear that I will be alone my whole life. Even with a boyfriend and lots of other friends of both genders, sometimes I just feel so empty and disconnected. I'm afraid that someday that feeling might not go away.

Yet at the same time I fear other people. I fear opening up only to be cut by malicious words or careless actions. I fear establishing bonds that might be broken

Thursday, July 17, 2008

I fear that the entire time I thought we were together because of love, he was falling out of love with me because of what we did...

Thursday, July 10, 2008

I'm afraid of pissing my son off if I point out one of his flaws that is interfering with his marital relationship. But if his intimidating communication style continues unchecked, I'm afraid he'll bully his way to a divorce, and he and his beautiful wife and children will suffer horribly. Then I'll wish I'd have said something despite feared consequences.
I'm afraid that I'm never going to escape this life-sucking career... that the unfair time demands of the thankless, joyless, mundane work will prevent me from moving on to the "next" opportunity... and I'll be stuck in this gossip-festering, back-biting, power-struggling, deceit-breeding corporate petrie dish. At the same time, at my age, I'm afraid if I lost this job, that I may not actually find a "next opportunity" in time to keep me from slipping into homelessness.

Tuesday, July 8, 2008

I'm afraid that I will never fall in love, that I will never have a family. I'm afraid that no man will ever see me as more than just a fun time.

Sunday, July 6, 2008

I'm afraid of becoming physically unable to work and becoming homeless and/or a burden on someone.
I fear that when I am old, that life will become difficult.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

My greatest fear is that I will die. Not because of death itself but because of leaving my baby without a father and my wife without a husband.

Friday, June 13, 2008

Getting married, finding an irreparable flaw we hadn't worked through before and meeting someone I think is better suited to me.


Leaving this relationship, going through aching heartbreak, and then realizing I should have just made the commitment and done my best years down the road.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Yourself coz you are more powerful than you think.

Monday, June 9, 2008

My biggest fear is that life truly is what it appears to be (yes, "tale told by an idiot, etc., etc."). Only on my death bed will I know for sure. I'll to post a followup here after I die!

Thursday, June 5, 2008

My biggest fear is that I really am crazy.

Wednesday, June 4, 2008

i'm afraid that all my deepest secrets will come out everyone will know and then people will walk away and never look back

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

The only thing to fear is nothing. Everything that is here won't last forever. It all has a beginning and an end. So find something you love and go for it!

Monday, June 2, 2008

I'm afraid that to guys I'm unlovable.

Sunday, June 1, 2008

I'm afraid that I'll never be able to tell you how much you mean to me.

Saturday, May 31, 2008

my biggest fear is losing all the people that I care about, and the fact that it's slowly coming true makes me want to act.
im afraid that im good enough to screw, but not enough to love.

Friday, May 30, 2008

I fear i have lied so much even i dont remeber the can i have been so dumb??
I fear that i'll be fat forever

Thursday, May 29, 2008

I'm afraid that when I come back from college he won't want me anymore.

If that happens, I'll be depressed all summer.
I fear the day my teenage daughter leaves for college/university.

I have raised her alone since birth and my entire life revolves around her. Every single thing I do is for her. Every moment I make is because of her.

My entire life revolves around her and she IS my life - the blood that runs through my veins and the air that I breathe.

She's growing up. She will eventually leave. I won't know what to do with myself after that.

I am scared to death.
I fear I am damaged at my core!
I fear never amounting to anything in my life.

Wednesday, May 28, 2008

I am deathly afriad of night time because I feel like someone is going to kill me in my sleep.
Post your biggest fear here ... just click on COMMENTS below.