I'm terrified of falling back into a dark trap.

I fear this feeling, that I can sense is pulling me down, farther and farther from myself, at a moment when I most need to be focussed, alive, down-to-earth.

I need myself so I can pass these exams that I'm so desperately afraid of failing.

And my family needs me.

I fear the loss of everything I love and want so much, and I fear I will have to face that fear, soon.